Friday, February 23, 2007

My Poor Kiddo

My daughter has broken out in a rash over the majority of her body. The poor kid. She has been on and off ill since before Christmas! This is getting ridiculous. She was on her 4th round of antibiotics, due to one of the worst all time sinus infections- as a result of the flu and viral crap + allergies that just won't go away. Cipro, and now I know she is allergic to it. For round 5, she is taking Ceftin. Not sure it's going any better- the rash doesn't seem to be getting better and the itching is intensifying, as of last night anyway. She's home again today from school- 2nd day this week. I swear the girl doesn't go more than one week before she misses school a day or two the following week. Good thing she is a smart girl and can make up the work without a huge ordeal. Let's hope I didn't jinx it, by saying that......

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

American Idol, ho humm

American Idol Round 1 tonight. Completely underwhelmed by most all the guys. The beatboxer kid from Seattle was probably the best. I liked a few of the other guys, but overall- there wasn't any one performance I was wow-ed by. Both the girls actually asked to go to bed before it was over! (Unheard of...) I was so not moved by any of them, that I didn't bother to place any votes. We are huge idol fans here, so the night was heavily anticipated and quite a letdown. One other gripe: please spare me the 2 hour show with 12 singers. PUH-LEEZ! Seriously. Thank goodness for the DVR. There's no way I could have sat through it all in real-time. Case in point: first 20 mins of the show; 1 singer had performed. ARGH. We cut off 45 mins easily bypassing the commercials. Hope the girls are better tomorrow night.

Yawn. Tired tonight. Back to School and back to early mornings today. 4 days flew by, of course. It's never long enough. I found myself wondering aloud several days ago if I would ever be one of the older folks that naturally wake up at 5am or 6am. One of the old folks I see out walking dogs at the crack of dawn as I drive my daughter to school at 7am, bleary eyed and half asleep.
Somehow I can't see it- but they do say as we age, we need less sleep. My oldest daughter actually laughed out loud at the notion. She's probably right; I'm more apt to stay up all night and then sleep til noon. We'll see I guess. Random musings.

Friday, February 16, 2007

1st day of Presidents Break

1st day of Presidents Break. First chance i've had to sit down and it's 4:15 pm. So much for a relaxing day! It hasn't been bad, just busy. Of course, I had to wake up- just to be sure B. was up. She doesn't have today off. Once she was up it was coffee time. Then I got a call from her friend who goes to class with her-- actually it was her mom, who said she was not going to class today because of mouth pain from having her wisdom teeth out. When I told B. she immediately freaked and started crying and refusing to go as well. Long story short, they both ending up going to class. After that drama was handled I had to hurry and get ready so I could pick them up on time.

Got home late morning looking forward to a little down time. M. wasn't even awake yet so I got her up. Made Cierra sit down and work on her state report. B. then let me know she didn't have the worksheets for this weeks assignments, so we had to go to school and catch her independent teacher, otherwise she would not be able to do any of her school work for the next several days. Meanwhile I got a call from a friend asking for computer help so after I drove B. to get her worksheets and took her home, then I went to see if I could help my friend.

I almost forgot about a 3pm follow up doctor appt for M. Luckily she did not, so I got home in time to get her and B. Took B. to work and then onward to the doctor. Just as I already knew- her sinuses are still infected. She is now going to try round 4 of a completely different antibiotic and if that doesn't do the trick we'll be going to an ENT. What a PITB. Poor kid. The doc just had to talk about surgery and hearing the bone "crunch" so of course she is saying "No Way!" Hopefully it won't come to that. He also said something about long term prednisone. Uhmmm, No. I'm not going to subject her to that.

So tonight is a valentine's dance. My daughter is trying to figure out what to wear. I'm so "not with it" however, to suggest one of her dresses. Apparently no one dresses up (duh) I wonder what she'll come up with.

I'm going to go relax for a bit before I have to start running around again. I still have to pick up B. from work later, go get M.'s prescription and take her to the dance. Tomorrow should be much more relaxing!

Thursday, February 15, 2007

4 day break, yippee

So the 7th grade girls basketball team made the play-offs. However, they lost- so they're done.
That's ok though- it was a great season. It was pretty exciting to make it to the playoffs for the league. The 8th grade girls won their playoff game and advance to the championship game. Looks like we'll be skipping it though, as there is a Valentines Dance tomorrow night that my daughter would rather attend. Gee, I wonder why? grin
I hope she has a dress that fits.... I do not want to go shopping tomorrow.

Speaking of M. Tomorrow is her 10 day appt back with her doc. I'm curious to see what he'll say because 10 days later and on her 3rd antibiotic, she is still coughing and still can't breathe well. Her symptoms are only marginally better. This has become very frustrating. She doesn't seem to be responding to the meds. I hope he's not going to ask us to get a catscan of her sinuses- but I guess I won't try to second guess it at this point.

Looking forward to the 4 day break. No basketball this weekend. Friday and Monday off school.
The biggest chore is going to be getting C. to work on her state report over the break. She does not like schoolwork and will try any means she can conjure to get out of it. I'm looking forward to maybe being able to take a nap in the afternoon. It's a sad life, I tell ya- when I look forward to a nap.
Oh scratch that- B. has to work tomorrow afternoon. So maybe I can nap Saturday instead. I'm pathetic.

Nothing more on my mind tonight, except bed. I feel exceptionally tired so I'm going to retire early. After I go turn all the lights off and prep my coffee for tomorrow morning. Must have coffee ready to consume after my sleepwalk to the kitchen in the a.m. It's a known fact that I will die without coffee.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Out of control Hair

I really need a haircut. I don't know what to do with it. I haven't done anything to my hair in about a year. I realized that today. A Year! That's really lame. I need highlights too. It's just so time consuming. Where do I find the nearly 3 hours it takes to cut, color & style? I've been really lazy but it's gotten out of control. I really should make the call.... I always feel great after I get my hair done. Someone kick me in the butt please. Well ok, not really.

Tuesday Morning Blah

Last nights happiness was short lived. This morning I got back my angry hostile won't get out of bed without a WWIII battle child. Damn I hate this crap. Sigh.

Monday, February 12, 2007

Monday, Monday, So good to me....

Well, it's Monday. Over almost. Last regular season basketball game was today. The girls won 34-3. M had lots of playing time and scored several times- once a sweet shot from the outside corner- it was a lovely shot! Girls were in high spirits. I'm relieved that the season is coming to an end. Now they await playoff decisions.

Tonight was a GREAT night. B was enjoyable to be around. I don't think there was even ONE sour look, tone or comment. We had some laugh out loud moments being silly! Times like this are so rare. I wish they were more often, but I surely cherish and hold onto them.It does a soul good. I think the new class she is taking- and the new routine of having to get up and get going daily, is actually doing her good. The getting out of bed part is still brutal (on me) but she seems to be better these past few weeks. So what's different? She had a birthday. She's taking a new class. She's working on a different subject with her independent study and she continues to work part-time; 16 hours this past week. It could be any combination of these factors. Oh, she's taking Omega 3 fish oil now too. I'm not sure if that could have an impact so immediately or not? It's not proven yet, but there is a school of thought that the Omega 3 supplements help with mood disorders. I wish there was some way for her to get more sleep- that is the one overriding symptom that never seems to go away. I've in fact decided to decrease her seroquel and see what, if anything happens. I was doing some reading today that stated that there is no therapeutic benefit from any dosage over 800mg. That is B's dosage and it amazes me that she doesn't sleep like a baby on it. The whole med puzzle is just that- a puzzle. The more I read about BP, the less clear it all seems to be. I don't understand WHY it's such an unknown.

I saw a really depressing Cold Case the other night. The show focused on a mother who was manic depressive in the 1950's and had been found dead in the snow. Turns out she was hospitalized for her manic depression because there was "no cure." However, she opted for a lobotomy because the doctors of the time believed it to be the only treatment that would offer some mood stability. Uhhhh yeah! Lets cut out part of your brain! What the hell? Seriously? I felt physically ill, while watching this and thinking about it. I'm so thankful that my daughter is alive now, and not 50 years ago. Of course in 50 years future- they may think what we are doing now is barbaric perhaps- but I hope not. So much is still unknown. I have to hope the choices I've made for her are the right ones. Soon enough she'll be in charge of her own health and wellness.

My brain is fuzzing over so it must be time to turn off the 'puter. I think I'll go read some of my current Barbara Delinsky book. Pure escapism. Just what the doctor ordered.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Sunday

Sunday. Relaxing. To me, Sunday's are like apple pie and baseball. Meant to relax. It goes together. Thank goodness for Sundays- when I usually can catch some recharging time.

I've not been in a blogging frame of mind these past several weeks. Life has been really chaotic, and way to busy. Throw in chronic sickness with one kid and bipolar crap with another one and it's been all I could do to muster the energy to stay on track from morning to night.

Things are good currently. Life is semi-stable this past week. BP girl seems more stable. Not as depressed outwardly and less anger/hostility. It's hard being on eggshells around her all the time. It's even harder feeling like nothing you do or say, helps. The powerlessness of it, can be overwhelming and all consuming at times. Like another friend who I know is struggling with similar feelings- I have not figured out the best "cognitive" way to handle life with her and remain positive and upbeat. Its the art of turning lemons into lemonade. I'm working on it, very hard. It's not something that comes naturally to me. I wish I could get her to read some blogs and/or books by others who struggle with living with BP. I read stuff like this all the time and find lots of stuff that supports who she is. If only she could see it, know there is path for her, even if that path has many pitfalls along the way. It gives me hope and I'd like to think it would give her hope too.

Basketball season is winding up. The last middle school game is tomorrow. I remembered to take my digital camera a week or two ago- I'll have to see if I can upload those pictures and post a few here. I'm so proud of my middle baby. She's in the throes of middle school and remains a good kid. Nice. She hasn't morphed into an unrecognizable alien, like some kids do. She got straight A's on her semester report card. She is athletic and has good friends. She hasn't gotten sucked into that snotty girl mentality that strikes so many of the 11-14 crowd.

Yesterday was the CCS middle school honor band/orchestra concert. CCS covers 4 local counties. ( A fact I did not know until yesterday.) All the kids must audition for a seat. This is M.'s 2nd year making a seat. She plays clarinet, although her interest is waning. I wish I could keep it alive, music is so important. For now, I simply enjoyed the concert- for I see a day in the not to far future when it probably will not be a part of her life, nor ours anymore. She plays so beautifully- I hate to see her give it up.

My mom is finally out of the hospital. Her 2nd back surgery in a year. A 3 day stay turned into a week. She was SO drugged and out of it. I'm glad she is home, because being 1000 miles away sucks. I can't go be there and again, it's that feeling of helplessness and powerlessness. It sucks!
I was pretty stressed over the whole situation. Today is the first day I talked to her and I know she actually understood who I was. Now, onward to face recovery and physical therapy. She sounded pretty upbeat, which is a great sign. I hope she can maintain that spirit.

The rain finally stopped and it's a nice day out. I don't mind the rain when I'm chilling' though. It's relaxing and somehow I don't feel so guilty for sitting around doing "nothing" when it's pouring out. Regardless- I'm not going to worry about it. Not today.